Since the beginning of the coronavirus crisis, I have kept a daily journal and it is interesting to look back at what I wrote at the beginning of the lockdown. I was in a state of shock and it took me about two weeks to get my head around to what was happening.
Since then, I have had the opportunity to slow down and taken the time to reflect on what matters to me. It has been a rollercoaster ride and I see myself, and the world, still on it. As the saying goes: when on the rollercoaster, make sure you don’t come off it, experience it, don’t resist the ups and downs, and you will get off in one piece! Clearly, we are facing challenging times!
So far, I have experienced positive results through the efforts that I have made over the last few months to keep grounded and focused. These have been on top of the efforts made over the years in trying to understand what was going on around me and make sense of what seemed confusing and uncomfortable.
It is interesting to look back at one’s life and be able to join the dots… and learn from the experiences.
Reflecting On Running Away
I was a very troubled teenager, unhappy and dissatisfied. In my late teens I left home because I thought that by going away, I would solve my problems. The reality is that one might run away, but the problems go with you!
What has made it difficult for me to share what it was like for me as a teenager, has been the fear that by saying I was unhappy, it would have a negative reflection on my parents and family. In fact, they were very generous. What was more upsetting was the fact that, the more they gave me, the further I pushed them away!
So, I had to deal with the dilemma of not being able to accept what I was yearning for and not understanding why.
Looking For My Why!
I’ve spent years looking for the answer, to “How come I seem to have everything I need, but I feel dissatisfied and unable to enjoy life?” The commitment to find an answer became my WHY and what has led me to do the things I’ve done and the training I’ve taken.
I am happy to report that I have found an answer to my original question and have understood what was behind my unhappiness. And what really matters to me is to know that my experiences could be of benefit to others by helping to reduce or even prevent unnecessary suffering and more importantly, to learn how to live a life of no regrets. This is both at a personal and community level.
I intend to approach this by promoting Early Intervention (both in schools and the wider community) and Social Prescribing by working within the NHS. My commitment is to make a difference to people who are willing to listen and do the work for themselves.
The work I have done has brought me to developing a model, a structure, that guides my approach. My aim is very simple – to support people in finding a philosophy of life that works and that, at the same time, respects diversity and honours the community spirit, and learning to live a life that is consistent with one’s values and beliefs.
In the forthcoming weeks and months, I will be sharing my journey. My commitment is to start conversations that make a difference and that will be of value to those of you who wish to connect.
With Love & Connection